It got me thinking "What has he done for as long as he lived to be deserving of such benediction?"
And then slowly,it got me thinking. The answer.
Throughout his whole life,Allahyarham was a kind-hearted man towards other people. When he gives,he gives it sincerely without expecting anything in return. He helped a lot of people,even those who stabbed him many a time. He knew when someone was fishy or wasn't sincere but when that person asked for help,he obliged to help. Like I said,Allahyarham never expect anything in return.
Being the Chief Minister of Melaka for 3 years,he had a lot of duties to fulfill. For as long as I knew him,he was never a man of bribery. He kept it clean throughout his political years. When people tell me "all" politicians are dirty,I tend to get mad because I know one personal politician who does not play by dirty political rules. He was sincere in his job. Whatever that was left in his hands,he kept it for the benefit of the state and not for himself.
My grandpa was a stern man who follows the rules and principals he created in his life. He never believed in any other thing except that Allah SWT is his Creator. He only believed in Him. Allahyarham never believed in any other type of things besides Allah SWT. He taught me that whenever I loose my patience,always read "Innamaa sobirin". He taught my mother to put our only faith in Him and everything else will be OK.
I remember all the small details he has done in my life. The little things he did were once big impact in a 11 year old's life. When I lived with him,he would be there to take me home from school. Waiting in front of the gates of the school for my siblings and I. Just like my parents,he never says NO to anything his grandkids wanted. I remember him taking my cousins and I to the bookstore once. He told us to get anything we wanted. I think at that time the family was just little so we had only 6-8 cousins. We took thick stacks of books and he never complained about wanting to pay. I remember the whole family living in one house when he was Chief Minister. We called it "Rumah Sri Bendahara" and I remember having breakfast with him at the main table before he shoot off to work. I remember the smile he has on his face whenever the family get together for an occasion or a simple family getaway. You could tell that he loves his family dearly and sincerely.
He taught my mother,that my mother later on passed to me,how to save.
"Ada RM1.00,belanja 70 sen,simpan 30 sen,senanglah seumur hidup"
"Ada RM1.00,belanja RM1.00,boleh hidup tapi susah"
"Ada RM1.00,belanja lebih dari RM1.00,papa kedana lah hidup"
My mother always followed his advice. I remember how he believed in my father when no one else did. He accepted his in-laws with open arms. Never once,have I heard him complained about any of his in-laws. I don't know about others but he certainly never said anything in front of my family about other in-laws. He opened everyone into his home with welcome arms but he keeps his distance at the same time. He knows when someone is sincere or not. Somehow he knows and I think that speciality was given to my mother. She knows when someone is fishy. Just like my Tok Ayah.
What saddens me the most is,I couldn't be there to see his face for the last time. To tell him that if it weren't for him,my mother wouldn't have had the strength she had today to keep going in life. To tell him that he was a Godsent to our family. To tell him that we'll miss him once he's gone. To tell him that he has been everything that we needed him to be. To tell him how much we love him.
My Tok Ayah has always been my mother's pillar of strength just like how my parents' are my pillar of strength. It saddens me that she has lost one part of her strength and one part of her happiness.
Where you are now,we hope you're in a much calmer and safer place. I will always keep you in my prayers. You have been and will always be a vital figure in our lives and I only hope that God gives blessing upon you and loves you as much as you loved us all.
Dearly missed,my Tok Ayah.
"Setiap yang bernyawa pasti akan kembali ke Rahmatullah"
Al-Fatihah
12.7.2013
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